Fake News calls it a pitchfork. I call it a rake.

PREVENT FOREST FIRES. RAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN.

Denying Climate change, the “Drumpadiddle” Administration plans to hand out rakes to all Asylum Seekers in an effort to stem the ever-growing threat of seasonal forest fires.

It appears that Americans are not willing to do these vital new jobs.

Our West Wing Emperor “Diddly Diddly” fiddles while America burns. It’s in the raging forest fires out west that he imagines himself running through while singing to the melody of “FIDDLER ON THE ROOF”. 

If I were a fireman.
Yabba dabba dabba dabba dabba dabba dabba dooooo.
All day long I’d raaka raaaka raaaaaaka.
Don’t you wish that you could tooooooo!

My apology to Topol.